The past two weeks have been absolutely INSANE at work. SO crazy. I have been busier than I’ve been in a long time and preparing for some time off at my job is really hard!! Thursday was my last day in the office and I was seriously doing everything at a lightening pace. I was typing IFSPs furiously, practically running as I dropped off assessments, mailed mental health providers, talked to supervisors and dealt with car seats… it was all sorts of crazy. Shockingly I got almost my entire list of what I needed to do completed (part 1 AND 2). There are still a few things I didn’t get totally finished but – all the main important stuff was done.
And last night myself and a fabulous coworker went to an yummy dinner at the Melting Pot to hang out – – it was awesome! So fun and my belly was SO FULL. yikes. anyways…. I’ve never been someone who always has work on the brain or struggles to keep it in check and know it’s not my top priority. Like I often say “I’m all about time off!” And one time I tried to convince Bryan to let me quit my job if I finished a word find in 10 minutes (he wouldn’t buy it.) I realize working is where God has me right now, but He wanted me to stop I would do it in a second! (Although I would totally miss my great coworkers!)
So when I’ve been trying to tie up loose ends and getting everything neat and clean to take a few weeks off, I’ve realized that it is really hard for me to step back. There are still a few things that I think “well maybe I should check my email… I should probably go ahead and schedule that TPC… did that Mom get my message? Maybe I should try to call her again… Oh my gosh, I have to deal with this all NOW!” I hold on to control so tightly. I want things to be the way I want them and feel like I’m the one that has to make sure that will happen! And when there’s a possibility they might not be that way I rail against it.
Are we noticing a theme in my life?!?
Anyways, last night and this morning I was praying that God would grant me rest and peace – that I wouldn’t be anxious about dumb stuff at work or be preoccupied instead of enjoying my time off. And really what it comes down to – I’m not that important. The agency, my families, the car seat program won’t fall apart when I’m not there. It’s so nice to remember that to keep things in perspective. I have to repent of my selfishness and thinking of myself highly as well as holding onto control and not trusting Jesus that He will take care of things!
And just in case I really wanted to stay stuck in my uptight, anxious self, my Momma wouldn’t let me. Today I had an actual true to life, full day off to do whatever will relax and refresh you sabbath. Starting out with a fabulous caramel macchiato.
Then my mom treated me to a manicure… (do you notice we’re kind of dressed alike? Not planned)
and a pedicure
and lunch here. With dessert. My favorite kind of lunch:)
I am so thankful for my parents and their intense generosity and love. They’re SO great. Love you Mom:)
And really- how can you be stressed and anxious after that? I am so thankful that God heals my anxious heart and sanctifies me even when my heart is so quick to sin. And how he reveals his mercy and faithfulness and grace through everyday things. Thank you, Lord. Let my heart hold fast to You.