In Ohio, babies have to be at least 72 hours old before the birth parents can relinquish their rights. Basically it means birthparents have 3 days to change their minds. Monday and Tuesday we tried not to think about it much (other than to randomly count down- “36 hours until you’re ours!”) Wednesday was another story.
The social worker was meeting with the birth parents Wednesday night at 8pm and told us she would call us around 8:30 or 8:45. So we had all day to just… wait.
I had underlying anxiety all day. The morning and the afternoon I would randomly take a big breath and Bryan and I would glance knowingly at each others. These nerves were pervasive for us both.
Now remember- on Sunday we decided not to tell anyone and we stuck with that. I’m not sure what possessed us, but not a single soul of friends or family knew where we had been the last 3 days. Keeping the secret was getting a little old and we were so excited to share our joy and our little man… and desperately hoping we wouldn’t have to tell them of another failed match.
I had packed up some of his clothes in a bag that morning and Bryan and I bought a video camera that afternoon. We fully trusted God was in control but we still didn’t want to get ahead of ourselves or do something to jinx it! We left the clothes at the place we were staying and said we could always return the camera. But we SO hoped we wouldn’t have to!
As the day crept (and I mean CREPT) on, I started getting more and more anxious. 5:00… 6:00… deep breathing, pacing. My husband and I later told us each other we both almost threw up. When our last match fell through, we said the saving grace was that at least we didn’t spend 3 days with the baby before the birth mom changed her mind. We were so hoping that wouldnt happen this time. It would be that much more devastating to have a face of the baby we lost, a name- to have kissed him and held him and been his parents for just a few days.
As it got closer, I was intensely aware that he was only hours away from officially joining our family or being gone forever. I held him a little tighter and cried freely. I remember whispering to him, begging him “Please don’t leave me.”
We prayed for him and us all day. At 7:00 the anxiety level was at an all time high… so close, but it still felt like an eternity away. And did we want it to be so close? What if after tonight we never saw him again?
We watched the clock and slowly but surely, 8:00 rolled around. Bryan grabbed both phones and sat next to me, checking them about every 30 seconds. We began to pray, deeply, crying out to God that the child who has become our son would actually become our son.
At 8:45 we got the call. I had Bryan answer it because I was holding our baby and knew I wouldn’t be able to talk through the tears to come. He answered and our social worker got right to the point. “I just got done signing papers with the birth parents- congratulations!”
OH! I just began weeping. My shoulders shaking, my sweet baby sleeping right through it, having no clue of the magnitude of the moment we just experienced. Kisses showered his head. My husband and I had such a joyful moment with our long awaited son.
Some of the nurses knew it was that night and celebrated with us too:) Baby B was sleeping so we put him down and went to call family and friends! It was AMAZING! We cried “We got a baby!” They responded “Wait, what? Like you got matched again?” “No. We got a baby. He’s here. His birth parents just signed the papers. He’s ours.” “Wait, WHAT?!?”
It was so great:) I cried every time I made one of those phone calls just to see their joy at God’s goodness and gift to us.
He was ours. Oh, there’s no feeling like it. The most intense day of our lives culminated in getting our son. We couldn’t be happier. He is ours. We are a family.